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Faith, Doubt, and Life-Giving Action

The year was 1995. I was freshly divorced and house sitting for a friend of mine while he was away for the summer. He had a late 80’s Mazda Rx7 that he told me to be sure I drove from time to time, but I had to be careful because the speedometer didn’t always work. Well, I got pulled over. By some miracle of chance, the officer believed me that the car was not stolen and that the speedometer was broken. That was probably due to the fact that I was pulled over for going too slow, but I still attributed being let go without a ticket to the prayers that leaped into my heart at the sound of the siren!

It was a trying time in my life, and that very night I did what I would never advise anyone do. I got out my Bible. I shook my fist at God and said, “If you love me, prove it!” Then I flipped open the Bible and stuck my finger in it – just like Thomas. Fortunately, I did not land in something like Daniel’s dream of a ram and a goat. I landed on Mathew 5:25, “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?”

I looked around and the reality of the fact that the small ranch style house I was given for the summer was actually on a polo ranch. I didn’t get to ride or play or anything ridiculous like that, but I was in the lap of luxury. It turned my life around. It let me see that I was so focused on what I had lost that I could not see what was before me.

Today I want you to think a little about how our expectations for God’s activity, or even our expectation that God is not active or present, can blind us to what God has done and is doing. Even more than that, this day is a day to remember that our belief – and maybe even our doubt, to some extent – in Jesus as the messiah of God is life-giving!

I want to start by sharing the story of Rachel Farnsworth with you. I’ve posted it on our church Facebook page in case you want to hear it in her words. She is a video blogger who produces videos that teach people how to cook restaurant-quality food at home. Apparently, someone commented on her video that her gray hairs (which are very few) make her look like an old hag. Rather than getting involved in a tweet war like so many others in our national fabric, she decided to address the issue (but not the person) directly.

Her story begins by recognizing that her husband’s opinion is more important to her than a stranger, and he likes the idea of growing old together. She continues to describe other personal and physical struggles that have haunted her throughout her life that have required corrective surgeries, and which will ultimately shorten her life expectancy. She ends by encouraging men to love their wives as they are and as they become and women to be comfortable in their own skin. Then she reminds everyone to be the kind of person that builds others up instead of tearing them down. "Be that person,” she says.

It’s a great message, and if everyone would just listen and put it into play the world would be a better place. It does make me wonder, though. If it’s all about ethics – the way, we treat each other – does it matter what we believe? For that matter, if our faith doesn’t take us to the same place – treating others with dignity – then is it really faith, or is it just some dressed-up form of mythology?

We often talk about faith as being the thing that bridges the gap between science and mysticism, but is that really all it is? Is our faith just a way to look doubt in the eye and say, “Nanny, nanny boo-boo!”?

I think this story of Thomas and the appearance of Jesus is about something more. I think it’s a story about the early church wrestling with the fact that they’ve been given the responsibility to decide what is life-giving and what is not. Even more than that, it’s a way to tell us that while faith may provide some basic assumptions about God, our doubt helps us embrace them as real and true. The beautiful thing is that both faith and doubt are knit together in something greater, and that is the hope that both faith and doubt are constantly moving us toward a greater understanding of what’s real and true.

Now, left to our own devices, all we can do is find what’s real and true for ourselves as individuals. It kind of reminds me of a t-shirt my brother used to wear. It said, “Rule #1, I am always right. Rule #2, if I am wrong, see rule #1.” When we come together as the church, not the institution but the Body of Christ working together, the rules become something more like, “#1 Faith moves us into life-giving action. #2 If doubt replaces faith, see rule #1.” That’s not as funny, but it’s real and true.

It’s real and true because we, as the church, have been given the responsibility to forgive or retain sins. Sometimes we’ve been right, but we’ve also been wrong. The whole protestant reformation was built on correcting the church. Yet we’ve still condoned slavery, denied the gifts of women, and relegated LGBTQ+ persons to second class membership (or worse, by condemning them, have given permission to violence). We’ve looked away on environmental issues to the peril of our planet. We’ve relegated “social sins” like poverty and racism to the political arena, and we’ve allowed ecology to take a back seat to economics.

Yet it is through the church that Christ constantly calls us to reform. In our denomination, we have groups and councils that are seriously engaging these issues and encouraging us to do the same! You may not agree with denominational stances or social activism in the church, but I can tell you that Jesus did. All you have to do is read the gospels to see it.

Now I know that we are not Jesus, but if the church is not the body of Christ, broken for the world, then what are we? I don’t say this to guilt or to shame. I say this to acknowledge that Jesus came into the midst of disciples gathered in fear and trying to shut out the world and said, “Peace. As my father sent me, now I send you.”

Then he breathed the Holy Spirit upon them. The same breath of God that hovered over the waters of creation flowed in and through their lungs and flows in and through yours and mine even now! That’s why the church must be the life-giving presence that we are. We are the ones who look at the world and say, “The Spirit of God is as close as your breath!” Hope in the face of chaos is as close as your breath!

I believe that. Do you? I do. Even though I believe it, I am not naive enough to think that evil doesn’t need to be restrained, and sometimes with force. I am also not naive enough to think that blowing things up works in real life the way it does in the movies. I am not naive enough to think that our breath alone can pull us from the chaos of poverty and injustice, or that laws can fix moral issues, or that we are ever going to be right 100% of the time.

Yet I know this one thing to be true. I know that our belief in Jesus as the Messiah of God is what moves us toward decisions and actions that are life-giving. I know that he brought peace that was not as the world brings; not a temporary peace; not a peace that depends on a sword to back it up; not a peace that is reasonable, but a peace that passes understanding.

It is a peace that compels us in the midst of our own suffering and joy to always be “that person” who is life-affirming so that even those who have not touched the wounds of Christ might come to believe. The good news is that we aren’t alone. As we try to be “that person” we have one another to help us along the way. That means that the first place that we practice forgiveness and accountability is right here, between us.

In our midst is always the font of grace and the table of mercy because we need it as much as anyone else might. For now just remember rule #1, “Faith in the risen Christ moves us into life-affirming action,” and leave everything else in the hands of the One who holds us all; even here, even now. Amen.

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