Acts 9:1-19a; John 21:1-19Picture, if you will, a tale of 2 conversions: Peter converting after rejecting the Way of Jesus and Saul converting after persecuting the followers of the Way. Consider, for a moment, what it might be like to be confronted by Jesus as these two were, and what kind of conversion might be expected of you.
OK, I realize that was a little more Twilight Zone (and a little more confrontational) than the questions you normally hear from this pulpit but stay with me because the passages we have received today are actually pretty confrontational. In John’s Gospel, we have Peter, whom we are probably more likely to identify with, and in Acts, we have Saul, the bad guy version of Paul, but also Ananias.
Before we jump into these stories like Peter did when he swam to Jesus in John 7, let’s talk a little about the idea of conversion. Generally speaking, most of you are probably here (on some level) because we don’t normally talk about “converting” others or “saving souls from hellfire and damnation.” Without going into great detail, the idea of “conversion” has a pretty complicated history which involves missionary activities in foreign lands where native populations were considered “heathens'' until they became “civilized” through the gospel and the colonization that followed. If you don’t believe me then I can introduce you to Chief Sherril of the Grand Caillou Band of Biloxi Chitimacha Choctaw tribe on whose ancestral land we are presently located.
I only mention this because we often forget the context of where things come from when they have been used in a certain way for so long that they have become second nature. Conversion, as we tend to express it in Western Civilization, is essentially the same as it ever was. We approach outsiders and expect them to become as we are – to convert to our way of thinking and believing and acting – and in the church, we tend to justify that because we follow Jesus.
That does not mean that we have it all wrong or that we do not need to teach or preach or offer the traditions of the church as a means of following Jesus. It just means that we have to be sure that following in the way of Jesus is what we are actually after.
Now, I know that I just cast a broad net over the history of the church – and all branches of the Christian Church have been a part of it – but I think our Reformed heritage does have a particular witness that can help us here today. Although there are those within the Reformed Tradition who still lean toward the idea of converting souls as their particular purpose, Presbyterians tend to hold the belief that God is in the business of salvation and we are simply called to, as Paul said in Philippians 2:12, “work out our own salvation,” or as I would say, to live into the salvation that we have all received from God.
Since I would bet that most of the folks I am speaking to may not have had a moment of conversion where you have come to a deeper faith – though some of you may – and some of you may even wonder why you have not. You might also wonder how to answer the question, which our Baptist siblings tend to put more bluntly, “When were you saved?” Well, if any of that describes you, I want you to know that I have a solid theologically Reformed answer. You were saved by Jesus 2,000 years ago.
That is not meant to be flippant, and it also does not get us off the hook for reflecting on the confrontation of faith that we find with Peter and Saul (whom we know as Paul). So let’s look at their stories a little more. You may remember that last week I said that Peter and the others would need more convincing than just seeing the risen, wounded Christ. Chapter 21 begins with them returning to their old lives. They did the thing. They followed Jesus. They got out alive, and they had to find a way to feed themselves. We don’t know to what extent they had left the Way of Jesus, but they weren’t hiding in fear anymore. They were fishing.
You know how the story goes. Jesus tells them to cast on the other side and they did (though I imagine there was some grumbling). Suddenly they had a net full! The Beloved Disciple (aka John) recognizes Jesus, and Peter is off swimming like Michael Phelps. There’s no real dialogue in the text between the point where Peter gets ashore, the disciples drag in the net, and Jesus offers them food except in v10 when Jesus said, “Let me cook it,” and in v12 when he said, “Have some breakfast,” but there was a lot going on and it seems to me that it was the most awkwardly silent time imaginable! V12 even adds that no one said anything because they knew it was Jesus!
Then it gets more awkward. Jesus singles Peter out and asks him in v15, “Do you love me more than these?” More than whom? Does Peter love Jesus more than the other disciples do or more than he loves the other disciples? Does he love Jesus more than the fish? The Greek text is a little ambiguous, so let’s say it is the fish – or at least the occupation of fishing. It’s not unreasonable – or unfaithful – to think that Jesus is saying, “Do you love the life I am offering you more than the life that you are trying to manage on your own?”
Jesus then asks him two more times, “Do you love me?” Each time Peter answers yes even more emphatically, and Jesus – the good shepherd whose sheep know his voice – tells Peter “feed my sheep.” As weird as that sounds, here’s what is happening throughout this whole encounter.
Jesus enters into their suffering and provides for them based on their place of need. He does it around a charcoal fire. The only other place we see the word translated as “charcoal” in John’s Gospel was John 18:8, the fire in the courtyard where Peter denied Jesus three times. Through the providence of God, the enemy camp has become the welcome space, and the threefold denial has been replaced with love and blessing and invitation and – dare I say it – communion.
Hold that thought while we shift over to Saul. I said earlier that Saul was the “bad guy version” of Paul, but if we have learned anything from Wreck-It Ralph it is that, “Just because he was the bad guy doesn’t mean that he is a bad guy.” What I mean by that is that Saul was very passionate about his faith, and he was trying to protect the holiness of his religious institutions and traditions. It just so happens that he was going about it in a very destructive way.
If you think about it that way, it kind of makes sense that he was confronted in a way that was a little less gentle than Peter. There is also a lot of good storytelling and wordplay going on here that I don’t want us to miss out on. First is that Jesus tells Saul in v5 that it is Jesus himself that Saul is persecuting. Then in vv10-12, Jesus goes on to confront Ananias and tell him that Saul has been told to go to the house of Judas on Straight St so that he, Ananias, can lay hands on Paul and heal him.
Ok, lots to unpack here. Straight St. – from the one who invites us into the straight and narrow way in Matthew 7:13-14? Also, it could just be that Judas and Ananias are common names. Matthew 13:55 lists Judas as the name of Jesus’ brother, but Matthew 10:4, Mark 3:19, Luke 6:16, and John 6:71 all introduce Judas Iscariot as the mustache twisting villain who will betray Jesus. Ananias, on the other hand, is the name of the person in Acts 5 who withheld from giving to the community of the faithful and was struck down by God for being selfish (hows that for a stewardship campaign?).
I’ll admit that I could be reading a bit into all that, but what we do see in the text is that Saul is not the only one confronted by his conversion. Ananias is also confronted, and what we see through both of them is that faith in the risen Christ can be restorative to both the oppressed and the oppressor. In fact, faith in the risen Christ inverts the power between the two and makes way for a more common union. Seems like we’ve heard that before…in the conversion of Peter!
While the restoration of common ground is the goal here, there is one more uncomfortable connection between these two passages. In John 21:18 Jesus tells Peter how he will glorify God in his death, and in Acts 9:16 Jesus says that Saul will suffer for the sake of his name. That’s not the part that really encourages faith for most people, but here’s what I have to say about that. Martyrdom and public suffering are not the callings of every disciple. Life is still going to be hard, and yet Jesus is still going to show up.
At least that has been my experience. In my experience of almost 52 trips around the sun, I have not had a single conversion experience where I was confronted by Jesus and my life changed. Instead, I have had hundreds of them. Some days I would almost beg for the actual voice of Jesus and others I am quite satisfied with the awkward silence. Mostly I have heard him through the voice of children and adults asking faithful questions. Mostly I have seen him in the eyes of those I have met in other countries with whom the only language and culture I share is the precious name of Jesus. Mostly I have seen Jesus through those in our own town who feel persecuted by people who love their religious institutions and traditions more than they love Jesus. Mostly, I have been confronted by Jesus when I see the faith of this congregation expressed through love and service and even a desire to welcome those they may have rejected – and who may have rejected them – in the past.
Friends, to be a follower of the Way of Jesus means to be confronted by his love for us, and for them, until there is nothing left but a more common union between us and them and God and all of God’s creation. Thanks be to God that we have one another, and this font of grace and table of mercy, to work out and live into the salvation we have all received. Amen, amen, and again I say amen!
Comments